Pirates sailed across oceans, hunted for treasure, battled enemy ships—and still had to poop. So where exactly did pirates go to the bathroom on a ship?
If your first guess is the poop deck, you’re definitely not alone.
Unfortunately, the funniest possible answer is not the right one.
Did Pirates Poop on the Poop Deck?
Nope!
Despite its wonderfully unfortunate name, the poop deck wasn’t the pirate bathroom.
A poop deck was located at the stern, or back, of a sailing ship. Its strange name comes from an old French word for the stern of a ship—not from what sailors did after eating dinner.
So if the poop deck wasn’t for poop, where did sailors actually go?
Pirate Toilets Were Called the “Head”
For ordinary sailors, the toilet area on old sailing ships was generally located near the bow—the front, or “head,” of the ship.
And that’s where we get a nautical term that is still used today:
the head.
The toilet was positioned near the front of the ship, close to the bowsprit. Waves and splashing seawater could help wash the area clean—which was probably a very good thing considering there wasn’t exactly a janitor arriving with a bottle of bathroom cleaner.
Eventually, sailors began using “head” to mean the ship’s toilet itself.
In fact, the U.S. Naval History and Heritage Command says the word was being used this way by at least 1708.
So Where Did Pirates Poop?
The short answer:
At the head of the ship—not on the poop deck.
Which seems terribly unfair.
If you’re going to name part of a ship the poop deck, generations of children are obviously going to expect more from it.
Why Do Kids Love Questions Like This?
Because kids are excellent at noticing the questions adults stopped asking.
Where do pirates poop?
Why do people fart?
Why are boogers green?
The question might sound ridiculous, but sometimes there’s a surprisingly interesting real answer hiding behind it.
And that’s exactly the kind of question we love around here.
Have a Kid Who Would Absolutely Ask This Question?
Where Do Pirates Poop? is a funny picture book for curious kids who like silly questions, ridiculous possibilities, gross-out humor—and discovering the real answer at the end.
Kids can guess along as pirates try some very questionable bathroom possibilities before finally discovering where sailors really went when they had to GO.
Perfect for ages 3–5, read-aloud time, pirate fans, and kids who think the word “poop” is automatically hilarious.
Where Do Pirates Poop?
Written and illustrated by Allie Compeau
MORE BIG QUESTIONS ARE COMING
WhistlePig books start with the kinds of questions kids can’t resist asking—and end with real answers hidden inside all the silliness.